Fadedwords

Hope is the thing with feathers…
 

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I Hate Money

I know that it will all be OK… however….

Right now I’m somewhat hyperventilating, because I have $462 in my bank account and approximately $647 left to pay in bills for the month.  This is a really, really not good feeling.  I know that I have some to deposit after I work this weekend.  And I have some pictures to give to someone who is paying for them, so that’s a little more.  And I have the portrait session, so that’s a little more.  There is potential to be OK.

My savings account is so low at this point.  This is what happens when you live paycheck to paycheck and you can’t put anything in to save.  It’s absolutely terrifying.  Living this way is going to give me an ulcer.  All I do is worry.  I can’t even afford flea and heartworm medicine for my dog.  If I spend more than $125 a month on groceries, I’m in a rotten position by the second week of the month.
This is not working for me, and I struggle to continue to be positive about it.  I’m running myself into the ground working and trying to make extra money, but it’s just not enough.
All I can hope is that this summer everyone will be busy, I won’t have to drive so much so I won’t be spending as much on gas, and I’ll be able to put a little bit away.
I know that right now I’m drowning under the stress of this.
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